An entire sea of water can’t sink a ship unless it gets inside the ship.
Similarly, the negativity of the world can’t put you down unless you allow it to get inside you.
– Goi Nasu
Workshop 1 defines the sources and types of negativity you face and provide tips and ways to deal with it. The workshop might be more on the common sense side, but it’s always a nice reminder to be aware of it. Below is the cliff note version of the lecture.
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There are two types of negativity: an external source and an internal source.
External source of negativity can be factors such as family, friends, school, work, etc.
Internal source of negativity stems from the clash of conflict between your desires and your needs.
So here’s the thing, external sources of negativity is categorized into two things. Things you can change and things you cannot change. For the things you can change, it’s all about whether you have the will to make it happen. This of course, is easier said than done and will take a bit of strength and courage to do so. Once you’ve decided that you can change things, all that is left to do is carry it out. For the things you cannot change, you either have to figure out a way to incorporate it into your life, or get rid of the toxic issue. This is a bit hard to swallow when the things you cannot change affect you deeply. It’s a skill that takes a while to develop, but there will be a day that you’ll recognize the difference between the two and decide on a course of action to take. Try to keep a positive outlook on life and you’ll surely figure it out.
Since internal sources of negativity are a conflict between what you want and what you have, this is a bit more of a challenge. A tip to dealing with internal struggles is to completely allow yourself to feel the emotion that you’re feeling. If you want to scream, scream. If you want to cry, sob your hear out. If you want to harm others, you should rethink that and find an alternative to that. Perhaps a stress ball.
But there’s a catch to allowing yourself to experience these emotions fully. You can be stuck in an emotional limbo where these feelings overtake and consume the majority of your thoughts and time. To avoid this pitfall, you can recall the better times rather than the bad, put a specific date you’ll stop excessively thinking about the problem/issue, or talk to someone else about how you’re feeling. Once someone else knows about your feelings, there’s a slight lift of burden. They can also become a source of strength for you to overcome this adversity.
If you take away anything from this workshop, know that you do not have to face this alone. There’s always someone out there willing to be a pal and listen to you ranging from your family, friends, significant other, or a stranger.
Never be scared to reach out for help.